The girls and I attended the one year memorial mass for Isabella's best friend Lauren's mom this past Tuesday evening.
I still struggle with the fact that she's gone - it often makes me question my faith and has me thinking about death far too often.
I see Lauren almost daily most weeks and she seems fine.
But what is fine?
She is 17 and does not have a mother.
It's been one year and to me, it feels like only yesterday that Izzy called me from school hysterically crying and telling me that Cathy had died.
The church usually gives me so much peace.
This time, if I'm honest, it did not.
It just made me sad. And it had me questioning all over again, why God would take away such a vibrant person who still had far too much life left.
My Ava Grace is obviously far too young to understand the impact of what happened to Cathy, what cancer did to Lauren's family; but believe you me, she knows she is gone forever.
She was so, so sweet at church.
And afterwards, we had ice cream and a magical walk through the forest.